shalimarfox: (Straight Laced)
[personal profile] shalimarfox
Live the life I do and trust isn't an easy thing to come across. There are people out there that will sell you down the river if they think it gives them half a second more on their own existence. Genomex is out there making deals, selling their souls trying to get to Adam, trying to get to us. Everytime we try to reach out and help someone we have to wonder just who is behind it all.

Every person I run across, every person I try to save from a life that I know I would never want, I have to question. It's become an automatic response for me. There is actually a process that my mind runs through aside from the usual reactions. It's a mental checklist and even sometimes when I get to the bottom of it, the trust still isn't there.

It's funny too, because even the people I do trust, even the ones I think I'm the closest to have all betrayed me in one way or another. Adam's lied... Brennan's shut me out, and Emma... I know sometimes she knows something but she keeps it to herself. It's all part of the game we play I guess. All part of the lives we have learned to lead.

Trust just shouldn't be so hard to gain though, it shouldn't be this unattainable thing in my life. I just know that most times the only person I can ever trust... is myself.

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shalimarfox

October 2006

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